What do gun laws and COVID-19 safety precautions have in common?

You’d be surprised.

I learned that they’re intertwined in our society…and they informed my understanding of the complicated conversations we have about diversity, inclusion, and gender-based discrimination.

How did I make this leap? It all started with a Concealed Carry Certification course.

Yes, you’re going to need some background. But once I’ve filled in the blanks, you’ll understand what I learned about fear and the power of self-reflection.

What learning about guns taught me about fear

As you know, I’m a born-and-raised Texan. We have a unique relationship with guns. I took it for granted growing up.

It wasn’t until a colleague asked me a couple of years ago to co-facilitate an open conversation about gun laws in California – I was supposed to be the comic relief –  that I realized there were serious gaps in my knowledge. My bloodline was no help at all.

So, I took the Concealed Carry course.

At the end of our program, we were invited to share what we’d learned and tell the class what sort of gun we’d purchase…if we planned to buy a gun. It was our right as members of the State of California.

I chose the revolver. 

My reasoning? It was small so that it wouldn’t take up too much storage space in my home…and its single-action functionality would require me to think carefully about each bullet…and the target. A semi-automatic rifle just seemed too big, too random, too heavy-handed.

I thought, if I’m going to fire a deadly weapon at someone or something, I should have to be intentional about it. There should be a pause between each shot…a moment of self-reflection.

Breaking through my reason was a sliver of disbelief and doubt, though. During our class, one of the sections included advice about how to arrange your furniture for maximum protection during an armed home invasion.

Was I going to move my sofa away from its perch – where I got the best ocean view – to a place where it could be a barricade in the event of an armed intruder bursting into my home and opening fire?

And, would I scramble for my revolver, and then my ammunition – which couldn’t be stored with my gun because of the immaculate conception, apparently – and hope that my “training” kicked in for that singular moment?

Preposterous.

I was going to live my life with freedom and keep my furniture placed in aesthetically pleasing locations throughout my home. I wasn’t going to be frightened into changing how I go about my daily life under the looming threat of an armed encounter.

I accepted that I might get shot and killed. It just wasn’t worth it to shift my worldview…

Fear and coronavirus

I’ve talked about “us & them” before…that tendency we have to “other” people who don’t align with our pre-existing beliefs.

So as I marveled at the fear stoked by these apocryphal scenarios of home invasion, I was suddenly struck by my fear of the coronavirus.

I have family members who don’t believe in the severity of the pandemic. They think we’re foolish to socially isolate, wear masks, avoid travel at all costs.

They don’t understand why I’m rearranging the furniture, as it were.

While my husband and I have taken great pains to follow all California health regulations and live in virtual isolation – running my business virtually has been an adventure, especially while seeing my family in other states living life uninterrupted by restrictions. 

They haven’t rearranged their furniture because they see the risk of infection as remote, improbable. The disease only claims the weak and vulnerable…and they don’t place themselves in that category.

And I understand.

Fear is fueled by marginalization

I’ve been made to feel like a sucker for following the extreme restrictions set to protect my loved ones and me from the pandemic.

And so, I’ve gotten defensive. I’ve closed myself off to information that contradicts my fear-based beliefs, even if they’re based on reason and fact.

So, too, have people with entrenched views about our 2nd Amendment rights. They’re attacked and told that they’re unreasonable…and human nature forces them to dig in.

I’ve been delivering diversity and inclusion education for the past 20 years. I’ve practiced, role-modeled, and encourage others to try and turn all situations around at some point and practice self-reflection.

Building on self-awareness is a base-level, foundational skill given any situation in which you find yourself becoming defensive.

I’d encourage you to flip the scenario around and understand that you might have made people feel the way you’re feeling in that moment of personal attack.

Social justice takes time and humility

Nobody can be perfect 100% of the time…and it’s certainly easier to believe that external forces cause your problem. Taking responsibility for an error in judgment or digging into a preconceived notion rather than expanding your knowledge of a diverse view…that’s heavy lifting.

But if you shed your habits and practice empathy – genuine empathy – you might glimpse someone else’s human experience.

There are ways to spark a conversation about diverging views. There are ways to share ideas and perspectives without putting someone back on their heels…or make them feel like they’ve got to dig in.

Would you like to have a conversation about diversity and inclusion…one that sparks growth? Contact me, and we’ll get started.