Unconditional Love

I didn’t really understand conditional love or unconditional love – I was just all in or all out.  When I think about my past and current relationships – I spent a long long time not being all in to try to avoid attachment and then loss… I know I have a therapist!

So, I got what is evidently called more emotionally mature or emotionally available and then I was all in, but only a few people at a time.  I often chose the wrong people, got hurt a lot, and tried really hard not to scream, “I WAS RIGHT!!!” and had to learn how to be in and out as needed in relationships.  I had to develop conditions.  Like boundaries, these are hard to develop, and are necessary.

Enter Leo.

Leo is my pug lab rescue mutt prince that has stolen my whole heart and taught me just how big a heart can be.  His love for me is unconditional – that is the first bullet point of his job description as a dog from what I understand.  What I have learned over the last decade with the gorgeous old man dog, is that my love is also unconditional.  Leo pees on open doors to the back yard as well as on my favorite shoes, always on my suitcase, and wherever he feels like it when he feels like it.

This is not exciting, and I seem to be able to turn these episodes around, clean them up, and love him even more and it seems healthy and equal.

I also have people in my life that our history keeps us connected more than our present lives or interests.  I have developed conditional love and boundaries to take care of these folks and myself when in the presence of these folks.  This is not exciting, and I seem to be able to turn these episodes around, clean them up, and love myself even more.  This also seems healthy and equal.